Today, one of my clients graduated. She completed a 6 month of leadership coaching intensive with the intention to regain her confidence, muscle up on saying 'no' and strengthen her assertive muscles. Sounds pretty simple eh? Like so many in the corporate space I have the absolute privilege to journey with, her confidence had hit rock bottom at the hands of a narcissist. She became powerless. This was a new way of being for her. She's a strong woman with a family and good friends. She has strong values and she knows what's important to her. She wants to model well for her children in this life time. We had some work to do. She was up for it. It wasn't an 'easy' journey. She's strong. She dislikes being held accountable, yet she's smart enough to know that her discomfort is part of the growth. A highly intelligent, strong leader. She was challenged and so was I. I could feel her pain. I've been there before. Holding the space and holding her accountable took me deep into her world. I became conscious of how easy it would be to have sympathy instead of empathy. I had to pull in the big guns for this woman. She had a red hot crack at blaming her husband for all that was going down at home. Cudos to this genius for catching on quick that it was about her and no one else. She is 100% responsible in her life for what happens with her. Full stop. BIG one! So, what happened during the six month period? She got annoyed with me holding her accountable for outcomes. I overstepped the mark and pushed the boundaries. We held fast. And this was where the metal hit the road. She got tired of the conversation and got into action. If there's one thing I know in the prime of my life, it's that human beings are at their best when they are in either of two states: 1. in action, and 2. doing stuff all. She chose action. She'd had enough of being in 'stuff all'. There is a time for both. She is present to the fact that she is more self aware of how she is feeling in any given moment, awake to when she is procrastinating and has choice around that, has the ability to say no (well practiced), is completing tasks, taking less things personally, sticking to timelines and has significantly increased timelines. How does she know? Feedback from her husband, kids, work colleagues, mentor and her leadership coach. I have observed this leader move from a place of powerlessness to a place of empowerment. I can see it in her eyes, I can hear it in her language. She is powerfully in a place of choosing instead of reacting. Cool eh? Job done. Leader empowered. Young lives impacted. Marriage stepped up a few notches. All because SHE had the courage to look at herself in the mirror and do the work. What work is there for you to do as we get ready to step into a new year of business? It's different for everyone. It's always impactful. I have two openings for leadership coaching this month and I'm looking for a leader who has the courage to take themselves on. Is it you?
To become different. To become something else. All I know is that it's a tough gig this business of change. As a sole parent for 22 of my daughter's 24 years, I am learning about what an empty nest means. It's different. It sure is something else. I'm still shopping for the same amount of food. I'm happy for her moving on with her career and life in a new state. It's healthy. My heart is still playing catch up one month down the track. Dad's cancer journey has now entered a new phase. It's different. As a family we are adjusting. What I love about cancer is that it gives us some time to prepare. We are in a zone that is different. And we get to choose how we manage that. I get to observe my extended family show what love looks like. It's totally fricking amazing to observe who we become. We change. Amazing what we are capable of when we are called to rise. I get to choose to 'woman up' or 'woose out'. Some days I do both ..... One of my leadership coaching clients is in the midst of massive life change. All she knows is that she can't afford to make the same mistakes in her new leadership role. Totally disempowered, she knows that change is essential. Who she is being in her family for her children is at stake. They are watching. They are modelling behaviours. This woman inspires me big time. She knows the journey is going to challenge her and she's up for it. To choose the journey of change is brave. Easier and more comfortable to stay in the blame, excuses, denial game. Then I don't have to be responsible eh? No matter what, I can simply point the finger at someone else instead of stepping up to lead in my life. It takes courage to tackle change head on. It can feel like the bloody gold fish jumping out of the bowl into the unknown. Seriously, the work we do on our own stuff is the toughest there is to do. It hurts. It's rewarding. It's a game changer. I find myself in professional and personal change mode right now. I'm uncomfortable. I'm out of my comfort zone. Where I would have lost my cool previously, I'm finding myself reflecting, seeking counsel from trusted advisors. I'm on a journey to step up to a level of leadership I have not entered before. It's going to take something big to woman up to this one. Bless my new client for modelling some courage for me this month. And bless my trusted advisors! Change is afoot. I appreciate these lyrics Pink made famous, written by Ben West and Busbee for 'The Truth about Love' album. There's always a risk of getting burned. So what. "Where there is desire There is gonna be a flame Where there is a flame Someone's bound to get burned But just because it burns Doesn't mean you're gonna die You've gotta get up and try, and try, and try Gotta get up and try, and try, and try You gotta get up and try, and try, and try" How do you handle change?